My Go-To Tunes – Christmas Volume 3

I started this post last year a few days before my father died. It was originally scheduled to post the day after his death. That obviously didn’t happen! I forgot I had it hidden in my drafts until I started searching for something else. Since it was already mostly done, I decided to check the links and share it with all of you. In case you missed volumes 1 and 2 of My Go-To-Tunes Christmas edition, you can find them by clicking on the following links:

My Go-To Tunes – Christmas Volume 1

My Go-To Tunes – Christmas Volume 2

Once again, I share these tunes in no particular order. For “classic” songs not performed by the songwriter, I have indicated the artist.

Carol of the Bells – George Winston

This Ukrainian carol, composed by Mykola Leontovych with lyrics by Peter J. Wilhousky, is based on a Ukrainian folk chant. It has been recorded by artists in every genre – jazz, rock, a capella. I have always loved George Winston’s album December and this version makes me think of trying to play my own version on the piano. I sounded NOTHING like this!

Wonderful Christmastime – Paul McCartney

This is another one of those songs which is on my annual list because of the video. When I was a teenager, watching music videos with my best friend Stephanie, this song would get regular play in the month of December. I am sure our parents did not appreciate our singing the chorus at 1 AM in the living room, but it was such a singable tune!

Angels We Have Heard On High – the Gardiner Sisters

There are so many versions of this melodic song. I chose this one because one of my favorite Christmas traditions as a child was singing carols with my sisters. We would harmonize at church, in the car on the drive to Noni’s house, or at home around the piano.

This carol is based on a French tune and is inspired by the Gospel of Luke, when angels come to announce the birth of Jesus to the shepherds. This carol is also the reason many high school choir singers learn  to pronounce “in Excelsis Deo.”

Sleigh Ride – Boston Pops

If you’re going to listen to this song, you have to listen to it played by the Boston Pops! After all, it was written just for them by Leroy Anderson. Granted, it was written in the middle of a heatwave in August, 1946. However, the orchestration perfectly creates the illusion of a carriage being pulled through snow. And it has some really fun percussion parts, plus that trumpet glissando whinny at the end! I couldn’t find a video of Arthur Fiedler conducting the Pops, but John Williams isn’t a bad substitute.

Believe – Josh Groban

I was so excited when Josh released his Christmas album, Noel, because I have always said he has a voice made for holiday songs. This Grammy-winning song (Best Song Written for a Motion Picture, Television or Other Visual Media, 2006) was written by Glen Ballard and Alan Silvestri and appeared in the film The Polar Express. I love the message of finding lost magic on Christmas day. How would Christmas be different if we all believed in magic, even just for one day?

Santa Clause is Coming to Town – Fred Astaire

I loved this movie as a child. It had everything in it – Santa Clause, a love story, an evil villain (the Burgermeister), good music and a penguin! Remember Topper the penguin?

Who am I kidding? I still love this movie. I watch it every year. If you haven’t watched it yet, I encourage you to do so. After you finish reading this post.

The best part of the movie is this last bit at the end. When the postman, Special Delivery or S.D. Kluger, voiced by Fred Astaire, explains Santa’s true meaning, it makes me feel hopeful. Santa takes some of our unhappiness away, and “if we all learned to give of ourselves, our talents, our hearts, maybe there really would be peace on earth.”

I’ll be Home for Christmas – Bing Crosby

Bing recorded this song, which was written by Kim Gannon and Walter Kent, in 1943. The song is written from the perspective of a soldier stationed overseas during World War II. Until I was away from home as an exchange student in Australia for the Christmas of 1990, I never appreciated the melancholy of the song. That year my father sent me a Christmas card – one of only two cards he would ever mail me in his life. His message, though brief, has stayed with me for many years.

“Although we may not be together for this holiday, we will always be in each others hearts and dreams.”

George and Andrew – The Boy Least Likely

I found this song last year. If you have read my prior Christmas music posts, you know I loved Wham! My teenage bedroom was plastered with posters of George Michael and Andrew Ridgeley. So, when I found this video from 2010 I laughed and laughed. If you have never seen a Wham! music video, you may not appreciate how clever this is. Go to YouTube and watch “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” or “Last Christmas” to get the full effect.

Just a few weeks after my discovery of this pop gem, George Michael died on Christmas day. George’s music is a huge part of the soundtrack of my life, especially every Christmas when Wham! makes a return to the radio. I like having a fun reason to smile about George this Christmas.

I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas – Gayle Peevey

Gayle Peevey recorded this song in 1953 when she was 10. I don’t know if there are any recordings of me when I was 10, but I guarantee if there are, nobody will be singing along to them 70 years later! Each year when I hear this song for the first time, I laugh remembering the time my niece and I acted it out using Strawberry Shortcake figurines. She probably doesn’t even remember it, but I clearly remember her using my stuffed puppy dog as the hippo. It’s just one of those songs that makes me happy. And some years, I need all the happy I can get.

The 12 Days of Christmas – Straight No Chaser

I know, you’ve read this entire list and you’ve been wondering when I’ll get around to including Straight No Chaser. Wait no more – here you go. We’ve already established I love a cappella groups. If the group includes many handsome men who also happen to be great singers? Bonus!

I’ve been a fan of SNC since this video clip originally went viral back in 2008. I’m one of those fans who goes to their concerts and waits in line for photos and autographs. There are at least 15 SNC videos on my phone, but for this post I selected the original video from 1998 – the one that started it all.

Merry Christmas one and all. May your holiday be filled with joy and peace.

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Because I’m Happy (At Least, I’m Trying)

This year has not been a happy year for me. Sure, there have been moments of laughter and joy. But if you look at the year as a whole, I have been depressed, cynical, sarcastic, moody, and angry. I know I have not been myself and recently I’ve been hit upside the head by what is really happening.

Since my femur fracture in January, and throughout the subsequent months of rehabilitation, I have not bothered with much beyond the basics when it comes to my daily habits. Most days, if I’ve been able to get out of bed, pee, and get dressed, I’ve been content to call the morning a success. Bonus points for the days I’ve managed to shower!

I am not a vain person, but I have been blessed by the hair gods. My hair is thick and pretty much does whatever I ask it to do. Every now and then I find a stray gray, but nothing that makes me want to rush to color it. As I dried my hair on Wednesday while preparing for a work event, I realized it had been at least six months since I took the time to dry and style my hair. Unless you count a pony tail as a style, my hair hasn’t had much of a style this year.

Friends and family know I can be counted on for lipstick. I don’t wear much makeup, but I always have at least four or five lipsticks with me. A few years ago at a family reunion, I provided various shades to all my aunts and many cousins before we took the group photo. Yet, I can count on one hand the number of times I have worn lipstick in 2016.

I love music. There are over 6,000 songs in my iTunes library. I am usually singing or humming, and most of the time I don’t realize it. This always makes for interesting times at work when I am not aware I am singing at my computer while people are trying to do work around me. But since January, I have rarely listened to music. Even sadder, today I realized I have not even opened iTunes on my computer since I moved in August except to download audiobooks from the library onto my iPod.

For the past twenty five years, I have treated myself to new perfume at Christmas. Since 1998, my signature scent has been “Happy” by Clinique. I like the scent because, well, it makes me happy. Friends say it’s “very Dee.” Wearing one spritz per day, it takes me about a year to finish a bottle. Today, I looked at the bottle of perfume I purchased last December and realized I have not worn any perfume this year.

I am an extrovert and draw energy from being around other people. Every time I have completed a Myers-Briggs Type Indicator personality inventory, my scores on the extroversion/introversion scale have been the same – total extroversion, not a single introversion answer. I draw energy from being around other people and seek out social opportunities. I nurture friendships and do my best to connect with others on a regular basis. Some people tease me for having too many friends. Not this year. I haven’t gone out to happy hour since last December. When I have free time, I don’t call friends or seek out opportunities for socialization.

These observations made me realize I am falling back into the trap of withdrawing from the world and nurturing my relationship with grief. I have a comfortable relationship with grief. I stoically cultivated it four years ago as I trudged through the “year of funerals.” Fourteen funerals in thirteen months can do that to a person. I became good at sitting alone with my thoughts, ignoring the habits which bring me joy and make me feel nourished and alive.

I’m walking down that path again now and I need to turn back before I go any further. This year, I am not grieving the loss of loved ones or friends. Rather, I am grieving a further loss of independence and mobility due to my injury, the loss of my ability to manage daily pain to a level which does not interfere with my daily routine, the loss of my ability to drive independently, and the loss of trust in some of my Personal Assistant staff.

When I am mired in grief, my daily habits change. Priorities shift. I compromise, trying to balance what I would like to do, what I need to do, and what I actually have the energy to do. Instead of practicing daily gratitude, I engage in destructive list making. I expound on all that is negative, ignoring all the good still surrounding me.

Today, I pledge to make a shift in my daily habits. I will resume my daily writing. I will start wearing perfume and lipstick again. I will practice daily gratitude. I will schedule time with friends and reach out to those I have been avoiding. I will enroll in that writing class I have been considering. I will submit that essay I have been working on. I will sing songs that always make me happy.

Because sometimes when you pretend to be happy, you find out you really are happier than you think you are. And Straight No Chaser singing one of my favorite songs really does make me very happy.