30 Days of Thanks Day 8 – Dolly (and voting)

Yes, I’ve written about my mother before and you should definitely go read this post about her if you haven’t already. Caroline, or Dolly as she is known to everyone, is the one woman most responsible for me becoming the person I am today. Many people say that about their moms, and they probably mean it with as much sincerity as I do.

I’m choosing to thank my mother again today because it is Election Day here in the United States. Today, FINALLY, we get to vote in one of the most contentious elections I have witnessed in my 43 years. I plan to vote, as I do every year, because I am a firm believer that if you don’t exercise your right to vote, you forfeit your right to complain about the outcome. I have Dolly to thank for my interest in the electoral process, and I don’t know as I have ever publicly acknowledged her role in this aspect of my life.

I learned about voting because I watched my mother vote. My mother, a first generation American, the child of Italian immigrants who moved to upstate New York for a better life, voted every chance she could. Mom voted in all the major national and state races each Election Day, taking me with her in the afternoon to polls located at the Town Hall before we then went to join Dad at the annual Rotary Club Election Day pancake dinner. I always tried to get Mom to tell me who she voted for, but she never revealed her choices.

The ability to cast a private vote is a privilege. I won’t tell you or anyone else how I voted.

So, as a child I never knew how my mother voted although I asked all the time. When she took me with her to the polls, I never accompanied her into the voting booth. Even when she voted on the school budget in the spring, I never went into the booth. I suspect I know how she voted in those elections though.

Never vote against the school budget, Denise. Never vote against better education. 

I don’t know if Mom followed her own advice about the school budgets, because of course she never told me how she voted when I asked. I suspect her status as the parent of six students in our local public school, and her role as an employee of the school district, may have influenced her views on the school budget but I’ve never asked her.

I am a registered voter because as soon as I was 18, the legal voting age, my mother took me down to the Town Hall so I could get the forms to register to vote. Mom parked the car on Main Street, in front of the Town Hall, so I would not have to walk up the incline from the parking lot behind the bank. She held the door open for me, letting me hold her arm for balance as I crossed the threshold. I don’t remember the conversation with the clerk as we asked for the form, but I could tell from the tone of her voice Mom was proud to be bringing “her baby” to this rite of passage.

I quickly started to fill in the boxes, pausing when the form asked me if I wanted to register for a political party. I had never really thought about whether I would want to affiliate with a political party, and was unsure if I wanted to check the box. Mom tried to give me advice as she looked over my shoulder.

My father always said you register Republican, vote Democrat. You should register Republican.

And just like that, I knew what to do. I checked the box marked Democrat because 18 year old me with an attitude was NOT going to do anything my mother told me to do!

Walking to the car, I asked Mom if she really believed you should register for a party, but vote for the opposite one. Now that I was registered, would I finally gather some insight as to how she voted?

Denise, you know I never tell anyone how I vote! It’s private!

After she retired, Mom signed up to work at the polls on Election Day through the local League of Women Voters. For many years, she worked almost every Election Day, all day, at the polls until her mid-80’s. I was not surprised by her response when I asked her why she decided to volunteer her time to do this.

People fought and died so we could have the right to vote. That privilege is the reason so many people like my parents came to this country. Now I can do my part to help the process.

Thank you Mom, for teaching me the importance of being an engaged citizen. Your example showed me how easy it is to become part of the political process. I know I am involved in advocacy now because I understand the value of my vote.


If you are a registered US voter, I hope you exercise your right to vote today. Like Mom, I don’t need to know how you voted – just that you did you part!



4 thoughts on “30 Days of Thanks Day 8 – Dolly (and voting)

  1. I have voted in every election since I was 21. I remember the first time my hubby voted, I was 20 and pregnant, it was 1964 and I was jealous that he could vote for the next president and I couldn’t. I have voted early because hubby is working the polls and had to vote early. You have a fabulous family.Great piece.


    • I turned 18 the year before Bill Clinton first ran for President. I have voted in every election since I registered. NY does not have early voting, so I’ll go before I leave for a meeting this afternoon. Thanks for the compliment!


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